I promise I have real book-related posts coming. I even have them half-written! It’s just, I’m in finals, and thinking a even little bit systematically about anything — even breezy teen romances — is a bit much for me. Thus, we have instead: this clip from one of my ongoing Self-Improvement Projects: Learning to Drive.
ELIZABETH: I am a driving machine! I handle motor vehicles with aplomb!
BOYFRIEND: You need to work on staying in your lane.
ELIZABETH: I move wheel, car obeys! I am its master!
BOYFRIEND: Did you see that stop sign there?
ELIZABETH: Whoa, why is that car coming toward me? Does it not grasp that I control the road?!
BOYFRIEND: Yes, the other cars are why you need to stay in your lane.
ELIZABETH: …Why are there FOOLS standing in the ROAD?
BOYFRIEND: You’re not going to hit them.
ELIZABETH: Don’t they care that they are PLAYING WITH THEIR LIVES?
BOYFRIEND: Please be less outraged by fools, more attentive to location of car.
ELIZABETH: FOOLS, GET OUT OF THE ROAD!
ELIZABETH: Hey, that fool is my professor!
[Wild waving ensues. Unclear whether near-victim realized the precariousness of his own survival.]
BOYFRIEND: I think this is enough practice for today.